7496 results found

1. Contamination .7

   I saw this movie over the weekend on MGMHD channel and it was hilariously bad - the acting is some of the worst I've ever seen. The actors were more wooden than the radioactive tree roots that were attacking everyone. I kept saying to myself "this would be a perfect MST3K movie!"

   24 votes

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2. Street Fighter: Assassins Fist (2014)

   A multi-layered series, turned to full featured movie that looks back to the formative years of Ryu and Ken as they live a traditional warrior's life in secluded Japan. The boys are, unknowingly, the last practitioners of the ancient fighting style known as "Ansatsuken" (Assassin's Fist). The series follows them as they learn about the mysterious past of their master, Goken, and the tragic, dark legacy of the Ansatsuken style. Can their destiny be changed, or will history repeat itself?

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   310 votes

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3. Belle's Magical World

   Aye, a bad sequel - a pointless, empty-headed sequel that manages to not only miss the heart and souls of the characters from the original, it can't even settle on a characterisation for any of them that's consistent within itself. But calling Belle's Magical World a bad sequel is underselling it so very much: this is a bad everything, so mindlessly divorced from anything that made its predecessor work that it barely even seems to be a continuation of the same world at all; more like a horrible dream that comes the night after watching Beauty and the Beast while in the throes of a particularly brutal fever.

   Aye, a bad sequel - a pointless, empty-headed sequel that manages to not only miss the heart and souls of the characters from the original, it can't even settle on a characterisation for any of them that's consistent within itself. But calling Belle's Magical World a bad sequel is underselling it so very much: this is a bad everything, so mindlessly divorced from anything that made its predecessor work that it barely even seems to be a continuation of the same world at all; more like a horrible dream that comes the night after watching Beauty and the Beast while… more

   11 votes

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4. Dreamcatcher (2003)

   Characters reduced to cardboard cutouts
   Mishmash if styles.
   Logic flies out the window.

   33 votes

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5. Bedazzled (1967)

   After hearing about the new Kickstarter MST3K Reunion, I was inspired upon bringing up this gem to be riffed, and no, I'm not talking about the awful remake with Elizabeth Hurley and Brendan Fraser... but the original classic with Dudley Moore and Peter Cook.. who put a rather unique spin on the 'Faust' formula.

   Or the whole 'sell-your-soul-to-the-devil' shtick.

   In this case, we meet Stanley Moon who is in love with Margaret. Problem is, Margaret won't give Stanley the time of day (wow, talk about obliviously cold fishes), which prompts Stanley to end it all.

   (Apparently in the Sixties, that was the big thing to do when rejected by the one you love, I blame that short with Tom & Jerry, but I digress).

   Anyway, just before he does a mysterious man called George Spiggott (SPIGGOTT? Seriously? Not Damien, Lucifer, or even the tried and true, Satan, or possibly a sinister name, but George Spiggott?. oh well). As indicated, George claims he's actually the Devil and will help Stanley obtain the affections of Margaret by exchanging his soul for seven wishes to do so.

   Stanley seems rather skeptical of George, because if George is the Devil, he ponders on why George can't simply make Margaret love Stanley outright.

   As George sighs, he admits there are limitations to his powers, and despite all his wickedness and cunning, he cannot make anyone actually love someone, since it's technically God's domain.

   Then when Stanley inquires why George is being so generous, let alone wants Stanley's soul in the first place. Apparently, when George was cast out of Heaven, he had made a bet with God that he could procure approximately 10,000 souls before HIm, and if George wins, God has to let him back into Heaven.

   So reluctantly Stanley agrees by following George to his office (which turns out to be an apartment behind a club, run by the hilarious personas of the Seven Deadly Sins, Raquel Welch plays Lorna Lust, the one with the Bust in this flick, BTW) and finalize the deal.

   One hilarious moment is when they are signing the standard contract, Stanley asks George shouldn't he sign his name in blood, whereas George says, 'Ah, traditionalist, aren't you? Actually, mate, I really don't do that anymore, but if you insist.' Ironically, they don't use Stanley's blood, but instead one of the Sins, Sloth, who is in reality is George's lawyer.

   At first, due to the unbelievable nature of his situation, Stanley doesn't believe George is the Devil or that he actually has seven wishes. So George claims he'll give a 'free demonstration' by granting Stanley a trial wish.

   Now you'd think Stanley would wish for something grand, but thanks to George's off-putting attitude, the man ends up wishing for a Popsicle (Ice Lolly, England, and all that rot.). Though Stanley teleports George to a local store to get the desired item, strangely enough, George ends up having to pay for it. Whereas George claims he's the Devil, not Rockefeller. (Apparently, there's not much pay in being the Prince of Darkness)

   Reluctantly convinced, George accepts George's offer, with hilarious results: basically whenever a wish is granted, if Stanley wants out, he just has to blow a raspberry and he'll be teleported back to George.

   And boy, do those wishes wind up going wrong in the most unexpected ways. First off, Stanley decides that Margaret would be impressed if he was more intellectual, but ends up almost getting arrested for sexual harassment. Another has Stanley being a rock star, only to get shot down by George in the form of another singer, who sings the movie's theme song with humorous lyrics.

   During all of this, Stanley starts realizing the old adage of 'being careful what you wish for,' not to mention what happens when you 'make a deal with the Devil,' as he notices how George ropes him into not only wasting his wishes, but devilishly throwing monkey-wrenches into them.

   To make matters worse, George tricks Stanley into wishing he is a nun (not certain how that works, but hey, who am I to judge?). Then discover unlike the other past wishes he has made, he cannot escape it, due to a stipulation when he uses up his last wish, he is stuck with whatever he has chosen. Confused, Stanley thought he still had one, but remember when George generously 'gave' Stanley that 'trial wish.' Turns out he didn't. So Stanley seems to be hopelessly stuck until George has a change of heart and gives him back the contract.

   Why would the Devil do this, you ask? Well, apparently God also presented George with another caveat (condition): before obtaining that last soul, George has to perform a good deed. But rather than spoil the ending for you (I'm not George, I'm a Paranormal Time Lord Wolf-Being, after all), I'll just say things don't quite work out as planned.

   So rather than dole out seven wishes for RiffTrax, I'll give you three reasons why this should be riffed, or possibly taken into consideration for their Kickstarter Project:

   (1) Next to Crazy People, it was one of Dudley Moore's better films: in this one, Dudley plays the hapless Stanley Moon rather well, considering he just sold his soul to the Devil for seven wishes. And the fact, whereas most people would be freaking out, he simply takes things in stride, and ponders over why the Devil is so evil, despite that he has made a deal with George in the first place.

   (2) Peter Cook is exceptionally well as the Devil. Truthfully, what makes the movie hilarious is the fact Cook's character doesn't implement the typical hellfire, deep voice or even pitchfork. He comes off more like a demonic version of Uncle Arthur. And it's funny how he justifies his evil deeds to Stanley, not to mention is current situation and how he got cast out of Heaven in the first place.

   One funny moment is when Stanley is helping him visit an old woman, to con her by claiming they are from the Pruney Eye Wash company, and if she has eight bottle caps and can answer a question she'll win a cash prize. Of course, she can't but George cleverly tells her if she goes out and buys eight bottles of the Eye Wash, he'll accept them and give her the prize anyway.

   Naturally as the old woman leaves, Stanley comments how terrible George is, as he watches the Devil calmly rob the woman of her cash, and shares her berries with cream with Stanley. As George comments, 'Me? Why that old biddy just went out to scam the Pruney Eye Wash Company out of 50 Pounds, you call that fair?'

   Another good zinger is when George tells Stanley about a tale of a guy trapped between two tigers in a pit. Stanley laments, 'How ridiculous, nobody would get into such a situation!' George: 'Stanley, you're right, you're much clever than that man, you'd never get trapped between two tigers in a pit, says the man who just sold his soul to the Devil.' (Of course, might be paraphrasing a bit, but you get the idea.)

   (3) The hilarious theme song sung by Peter Cook. When Stanley becomes a rock star to gain Margaret's admiration and affection on a famous television show, Cook appears as a rival to sing 'Bedazzled' but what makes it outrageous is the deadpan way he delivers the lyrics when the background singers sing their part. My favorite classic response is after they sing, 'You drive me wild, you drive me wild,' he responds with the deadpan remark, 'You fill me with inertia.'

   Overall, this would definitely be a great film for the RiffTrax crew to take a stab at, since this one does take a classic genre and gives it a a refreshing spin, and though there are no bloodfests, gore and burning bodies, it is disturbing to see both Dudley and Peter dressed as nuns.

   Here's the clip of Peter singing the theme song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXnoWb88Jr4

   And here's the trailer for the film as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8tA1wH3cck

   After hearing about the new Kickstarter MST3K Reunion, I was inspired upon bringing up this gem to be riffed, and no, I'm not talking about the awful remake with Elizabeth Hurley and Brendan Fraser... but the original classic with Dudley Moore and Peter Cook.. who put a rather unique spin on the 'Faust' formula.

   Or the whole 'sell-your-soul-to-the-devil' shtick.

   In this case, we meet Stanley Moon who is in love with Margaret. Problem is, Margaret won't give Stanley the time of day (wow, talk about obliviously cold fishes), which prompts Stanley to end it all.

   (Apparently in the Sixties, that… more

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   15 votes

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6. Speedtrap

   1. Joe Don Baker!

   2. More boom mikes!

   3. More 70s at its worst!

   Part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5LuKWBD_nw (I'm not providing the other parts; click on that link and look under "hotrodgirl86" to see the rest!)

   IMDB page: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076746/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

   33 votes

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7. The World's Greatest Sinner
   4 votes

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8. "How to Be Well Groomed" (1948)

   Something that I just found on YouTube, it's quite funny without commentary, so if Rifftrax does this, it would be hilarious.

   24 votes

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9. Please start making mp3 riffs again.

   I haven't bought hardly anything from you guys since you stopped doing Mp3s. I understand it's probalby not as lucrative but the old movies suck and it's better watching something good with you guys raggin on it than suffering ding dong flicks for a few laughs. Luvyabye. PS, I made a Riff but sorry, I won't give out my SSN just to do that. Luvyabye again.

   405 votes

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10. Blacula (1972)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=ADzsXZvr814

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=SpJpdKFZnN4

    oh what fun

    293 votes

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11. Runaway (1984)

    Michael Critchon (of Jurassic Park fame) brought us this little bizarre tale of a detective and spider droids, and the KISS rock star who planned it all..

    About the time Tom Selleck was making the jump from Magnum P.I. to films, he decided to go from a private detective in Hawaii to a futuristic police officer who tracks down rogue robots (watch out, Tom, Crow and Gypsy).

    Anyway imagine if someone took I, Robot, spliced it with the backdrop to 'Demolition Man,' and then put in the grizzled cop from 'Blade Runner' (but with a kid) and you'd have this movie.

    Oh, and the chick who played in RoboCop in this one as well.

    Here's the spiel, famille on this synopsis: somewhere in a Jetsons/Blade Runner future, robots do practically everything for people. But because things aren't always flawless, Jack Ramsay (Ramsay? Man, what was up with these names?!), belongs to a specialized police force that deals with rogue robots. Mainly by shutting them down with their special guns that emit electromagnetic pulses. Usually it's a normal day for Jack, until a mysterious outbreak of robots going murderous occurs (doncha hate when that happens).

    Mysteriously, the only clue Jack has are these mysterious spider droids that kill their victims by injecting acid into them (no seriously). Especially those who know something about why these mechanical wonders are becoming homicidal, mechanical wonders.

    Turns out Gene Simmons, aka Luther, (yes, Luther and NOT Luthor) is some sort of twisted genius who plans on making robots go nuts and slaughter mankind for his own enjoyment because he wasn't loved as a human... or something to that effect... and now has targeted Jack's son for some reason. Bizarre, isn't it? Not target the powerful men, nor government officials, or even the cops that can shut down the rogue robots, but Jack's son... talk about flawed plans, but hey, when you were a rock star, guess you can do anything, eh?

    Here's why RiffTrax should riff this film:

    1. Hilarious overdone premise: Ever since Metropolis, we've seen films where robots usually turn on their human masters, but in this case, they don't just go rogue immediately.

    2. Gene Simmons: Strange how I've never seen Mr. Simmons out of makeup, and the fact it's the first time he's played a villain, but from what you see, it's quite obvious. You know, how the producers want you to think he's not evil, but you know he is, and everyone is oblivious to it, except for the hero, who--after wasting several minutes of film--discovers he's not quite the 'good kid next door.'

    3. The Spider Bots: The funniest killer robots since The Daleks, for the fact nobody can actually crush these things and they just sit there and let them inject them. Whereas Tom Selleck goes through a dramatic scene with them, and when Gene deals with them, he just freaks out rather than swatting them off. Seriously, you could just throw an EMP bomb at them, but nobody thinks these things can be defeated and like the Daleks, they just keep on coming regardless.. in fact they used them in the trailers and promos for the film itself, even though you don't see them much in the film itself. Except when they're offing someone who keeps attempting to warn Jack about them, or they're just being a total pudhball in the film.

    Though I couldn't locate the full film (damn YouTube), I did find a trailer for it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lA6ybohAVq8

    Michael Critchon (of Jurassic Park fame) brought us this little bizarre tale of a detective and spider droids, and the KISS rock star who planned it all..

    About the time Tom Selleck was making the jump from Magnum P.I. to films, he decided to go from a private detective in Hawaii to a futuristic police officer who tracks down rogue robots (watch out, Tom, Crow and Gypsy).

    Anyway imagine if someone took I, Robot, spliced it with the backdrop to 'Demolition Man,' and then put in the grizzled cop from 'Blade Runner' (but with a kid) and you'd have this… more

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    59 votes

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12. Disney rides

    Riff disney and other theme park rides. Small world would actually be fun to go on. Plenty of rides to riff between disney and universal. The riff would only need to be 5-15 minutes each. Wouldn't even need to go to disney to write them cause plenty of people have uploaded all the rides in full on YouTube.

    10 votes

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13. Young Cycle Girls

    This movie is comedy gold, especially with the silly Cruisin Down The Road song throughout the movie. It's Easy Rider with girls, riding across the country, meeting strange characters and then when they reach their destination they all get shot and killed. The end.

    https://youtu.be/2kBbmtYOq78

    13 votes

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14. Recommended riff

    The Stuff (1985)

    7 votes

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15. Rhinestone

    with Sylvester Stallone and Dolly Parton

    327 votes

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16. Darkman (1990) Liam Neeson

    I actually feel bad cause I used to love this movie as a kid.

    okay!!!:

    1- Liam Neeson is some kinda skin doctor or geneticist, who has a 3D printer in 1990 for some reason.

    2-Hes an anti hero with a horrible disfigured and burnt face

    3-And the movie was directed by Sam Raimi so hold on to your barf bags cause this one's a "spinner".

    41 votes

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17. The Murder of Sgt. Macklin

    from the back of the VHS box: "Harry Furgeson is an entrepreneur. That means he'll do almost anything that has a buck in it. Almost anything, that is, except go back into his newly acquired building that appears to be haunted. When he meets Drifter Mike Broderick, Harry thinks his problems are solved, but they are just beginning."

    The movie is watchable, surprisingly, without a riff, if you can look past the non-existent production values.

    I really do think it would be perfect for a B-movie riff.

    15 votes

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18. The Sid story

    Please I just saw this motivation trading film from the 80's starring Dennis franz. It's ripe for riffing.
    http://youtu.be/uBfdyLGm89o

    12 votes

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19. The terminal man

    The Terminal Man
    Cheesy Michael Crichton
    Hammy George Segal
    Shotty filmmaking

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    17 votes

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20. Wolfcop (2014)

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2781516/

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Spd_v-d5-xs

    This needs to be done

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    348 votes

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