144 results found

1. Marked for Death

   One of Segals earlier starring roles (think it was his 3rd or 4th starring role), so not as much cheese as his later films, but still enough to riff!
   https://youtu.be/lkcqotZsi6I

   23 votes

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2. Wasp Woman

   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfruCEhxT3Y Classic Corman stinker from 1959. Ex-glamor girl wno cosmetic corporation exec approaching 40 pins hopes for rejuvenation on old scientist claiming to have created rejuvenation formula from wasp royal jelly.

   Cinematic Titanic riffed this one a few years ago -- I saw them do it live on their farewell tour in '13 -- and they did a real bang-up job on it; still, I'd love to see what you guys can do with it.

   Roger Corman flicks: the gift that keeps on giving.

   28 votes

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3. High School Musical 3

   PLEASE! And the second one! And the 4th one, when it comes (and it is).

   16 votes

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4. Sixteen Candles

   1984 movie about a girl's family forgetting about her 16th birthday and her day is just all around crappy. She thinks her crush doesn't know she's alive because of his bangin hot girlfriend who looks like she's 25, her annoying grandparents are over her house for her sister's wedding and brought a weird foreign exchange student along with them, and she can't seem to escape getting hit on by a wimpy geek.

   24 votes

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5. International Airport (1985)

   The manager of a large metropolitan airport tries to deal with the stress of his job, and the various characters that work for him. There is essentially no main plot to carry the film. The entire movie is built up of subplots.

   This ABC TV movie of the week stars Gil Gerard ("BUCK ROGERS IN THE 25TH CENTURY"), and features such actors as Bill Bixby ("THE INCREDIBLE HULK"), Robert Vaughn (THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN), Kurtwood Smith (ROBOCOP), Vera Miles (PSYCHO) and George Kennedy (the AIRPORT and NAKED GUN franchises).

   A copy available on youtube actually includes commercials, similar to the STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL. Maybe you guys could do something with that.

   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5ikHY_6cSk

   The manager of a large metropolitan airport tries to deal with the stress of his job, and the various characters that work for him. There is essentially no main plot to carry the film. The entire movie is built up of subplots.

   This ABC TV movie of the week stars Gil Gerard ("BUCK ROGERS IN THE 25TH CENTURY"), and features such actors as Bill Bixby ("THE INCREDIBLE HULK"), Robert Vaughn (THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN), Kurtwood Smith (ROBOCOP), Vera Miles (PSYCHO) and George Kennedy (the AIRPORT and NAKED GUN franchises).

   A copy available on youtube actually includes commercials, similar to the STAR… more

   25 votes

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6. Rockula

   1. It has Thomas Dolby as a glitter-peg-legged, ham bone wielding pirate who owns a Death Park and makes his own commercials AND drives the Munster Koach.
   2. It features a totally unnecessary, but really sexy/fun song and dance routine by Toni Basil while she's meeting her son's new girlfriend, presumably for the 19th time.
   3. Features a vampire band working through every 80s/90 music genre, with song lyrics like, "He's the DJ, I'm the vampire." Bo Diddly and Susan Tyrrel provide the backup band.

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   32 votes

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7. Hammerman

   Single season of 13 episodes of a monstrously failed animated series around the late 80's and early 90's freak rapper, MC Hammer.

   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQiwzhTNmtc
   http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0179572/combined

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   17 votes

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8. Man With the Iron Fists

   This box office flop was written by RZA (of WuTang Clan fame) and Eli Roth. Set in 19th-century China, a stranger (RZA) settles in a jungle village and becomes its blacksmith. Radical tribal factions force him to fashion elaborate tools of destruction, and the clans' conflict soon erupts into a full war. Knowing he must take action, the blacksmith channels an ancient energy to transform himself into a human weapon. Fighting beside iconic heroes, the blacksmith harnesses this incredible power to defend his adopted people from an army of soulless villains. The gratuitous blood and old kung fu movie style cinematography make it ripe for the riff picking. Also starring Russell Crowe, Lucy Liu, Dave Bautista, and Pam Grier.

   This box office flop was written by RZA (of WuTang Clan fame) and Eli Roth. Set in 19th-century China, a stranger (RZA) settles in a jungle village and becomes its blacksmith. Radical tribal factions force him to fashion elaborate tools of destruction, and the clans' conflict soon erupts into a full war. Knowing he must take action, the blacksmith channels an ancient energy to transform himself into a human weapon. Fighting beside iconic heroes, the blacksmith harnesses this incredible power to defend his adopted people from an army of soulless villains. The gratuitous blood and old kung fu movie style… more

   28 votes

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9. The Four Skulls of Jonathan Drake (1959)

   Howdy again, I suggested APE (1976 Korean) last time. Now presenting The Four Skulls of Jonathan Drake (1959). Watched this last night and could not stop making comments. The film was released (by UA) the year before Columbia released "13 Ghosts" and you can see that Castle took a lot of his production ques and "old dark house" memes from this film. It starts with some hokey floating skull effects (al la 13 ghosts") and a great Amazonian headhunter with his mouth sewn shut. The detective in the film moves about 1.5x slower than the rest of the film (WFT?). Direction is fairly tight, but the (relatively) lush sets, flubs (boom mike shadow - plywood skull cabinet in marble & gilt tomb, direct questions asked but never answered and overlooked) make this a perfect target. The "comedy of threes" (and fives) abound. Not to mention that the antagonist is a two hundred year old witch doctor who sewed a white man's head on his native body (the horror). Anyway. a great old B movie to watch and an easy target for Riff/MYST3000. - Best Carl

   Howdy again, I suggested APE (1976 Korean) last time. Now presenting The Four Skulls of Jonathan Drake (1959). Watched this last night and could not stop making comments. The film was released (by UA) the year before Columbia released "13 Ghosts" and you can see that Castle took a lot of his production ques and "old dark house" memes from this film. It starts with some hokey floating skull effects (al la 13 ghosts") and a great Amazonian headhunter with his mouth sewn shut. The detective in the film moves about 1.5x slower than the rest of the film (WFT?).… more

   19 votes

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10. Bloody Birthday (1981)

    From 1981, a film about three children who share the same birthday who go on a killing spree on their 10th birthday!
    https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0082084/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0

    13 votes

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11. Star Maidens

    There was an Anglo-German production in the 1970s called Star Maidens, there were 13 roughly 30 minute episodes, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Maidens, it even had people in it who were famous at the time or went on to become more famous. The premise was that there was a rogue planet called Medusa ruled by women and two men escape to Earth seeking sanctuary, and such is the plot. But it's amazingly camp, there is lot's of running about with almost dance steps in, there are German actors who could probably speak decent English but seem to be forced into the German of comic book German POW guards, for you alien ze escape is over! It's worthy of the efforts of a really good Rifftrax, it's got all the right elements of being cheesy, famous actors, sci-fi, camp as a bag of yellow frogs, and from the golden age of crappy sci-fi YV the 1970s, also being Anglo-German what more could you ask for.

    There was an Anglo-German production in the 1970s called Star Maidens, there were 13 roughly 30 minute episodes, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Maidens, it even had people in it who were famous at the time or went on to become more famous. The premise was that there was a rogue planet called Medusa ruled by women and two men escape to Earth seeking sanctuary, and such is the plot. But it's amazingly camp, there is lot's of running about with almost dance steps in, there are German actors who could probably speak decent English but seem to be forced into the German of… more

    28 votes

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12. Hollow Point (1996)

    Cast: John Lithgow, Donald Sutherland, Tia Carrere, all lead by the Star, that dude from The X-Files.
    This movie is that wonderful kind of bad, just good enough that you don't feel like you have to turn it off, so you can sit through the whole 13 year old's fever dream of a movie. The movie has a the swagger of a Tarentino film's fan club member's first script. And yet somehow it's got money to burn, Cars destroyed, rooms destroyed, buildings destroyed, and John Lithgow and Donald Sutherland's credibility destroyed, in a 90 minute long drug fueled gunfight.

    IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113313/
    Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AH1t-h0yRuU&ab_channel=MillenniumMedia

    Cast: John Lithgow, Donald Sutherland, Tia Carrere, all lead by the Star, that dude from The X-Files.
    This movie is that wonderful kind of bad, just good enough that you don't feel like you have to turn it off, so you can sit through the whole 13 year old's fever dream of a movie. The movie has a the swagger of a Tarentino film's fan club member's first script. And yet somehow it's got money to burn, Cars destroyed, rooms destroyed, buildings destroyed, and John Lithgow and Donald Sutherland's credibility destroyed, in a 90 minute long drug fueled gunfight.

    IMDB: … more

    23 votes

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13. Prison-A-Go-Go

    Its a horrible low budget movie about a mad scientist who turns women into porcupines (yes, the animal.) They then have completely pointless and unexplained shower scenes. There is a count down time to the next shower scene in the lower right corner.

    Oh, and then ninja's attack for no reason. See it to believe it.

    Yes, exploitative garbage that needs your riff'n.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0339534/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

    You can watch it here.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f13P-_ebDdA

    15 votes

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14. The Unearthly (1957)

    Professor Charles Conway is a mad scientist attempting to develop the proverbial fountain of youth by creating "the 17th gland". Ignoring all aspects of scientific ethics, his research subjects are people who have no family and are under the impression that the doctor can cure their depression. However, his research hasn't been successful and his subjects are turned into grotesque zombies. Some of Conway's patients begin to catch on to his scheme and intend to stop him. Written by Brian D. Switzer
    Stars John Carradine,,,enough said.

    25 votes

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15. Expendables 3

    Because its PG-13

    6 votes

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16. Captain Kronos, Vampire Hunter (1974)

    If you thought TWILIGHT had you scratching your head over 'sparkling' vampires, this film will make you wonder WHAT kind of vampires Captain Kronos is pursuing.

    The best way to explain is to get into the film itself. Starts off with two girls in the woods chasing one another (oh, yes, like that's REAL safe..) and one goes off alone deeper into the woods. Enter the ominous-looking, cloaked figure. Next comes the bizarre director's choice of having the camera showing us the perspective of the figure.

    At first the girl recoils in fear, then suddenly smiles (as if the 'vampire' either hypnotized her, or spiked the flowers with poppies, you be the judge). The vampire then attacks, but not by chomping down on her neck, either leaving the cliche puncture wounds, or tearing out her throat. Instead, the vampire apparently kisses her (no kidding), causing blood to trickle from her mouth.

    Afterwards when she is found, apparently she's transformed into an old woman. Strange, huh? Anyway, Kronos and his crew come onto the scene.

    Now, at this point, I should tell you, all your standard classic Hollywood vampire conventions are thrown out the window. First off, one of Kronos' side-kick, a hunchback professor, which looks like a dapper Frenchman with a growth, buries boxes of dead frogs about the forest. As the mysterious cloaked figure rides by, they dig them up and discover (ta-daah), they're alive.

    Apparently in this universe, vampires can re-animate dead amphibians. Also they kiss people and drain them not only of blood, but of their youth as well.

    Meanwhile Kronos meets the local doctor, who is close friends with him, and we learn a little insight about him. Obviously a soldier from a previous war (not clear on which one, tho, never say), Kronos' family was murdered by vampires, which has made him go into this profession, but it never goes into why, if he's after the head vampire, or if he's seeking the one responsible.

    In fact, when he meets up with a female local (Caroline Munro), it requires a bit of suspending disbelief that Kronos had ever settled down with a family in the first place.

    But back to the main plot, Dr. Marcus (Kronos' friend) decides on conducting some more investigations, while Kronos' partner and female (ahem) Companion attempt to set up traps to catch the vampire in the act.

    Now in all fairness, one actual true vampire attack occurs when a bat does attack a female in a hilarious scene that would make Birdemic's dive-bombing bird look like Shakespeare. But I digress, Dr. Marcus considers the main suspects to be the royal Durward family, since evidence points to Lady Durward to be around when the attacks occur. Her children do appear sinister in nature for the fact they have white hair and kind of act like snots. Y'know, typical 17th Century aristocrats.

    One thing interesting about this film, I suspect the whole 'vampire blood contagion' shtick originated from here, though in this case, it doesn't really explain how this thing works. On his way back, Dr. Marcus gets blood splattered on him, though we don't see how this is possible. And when he gets home, the next morning, he discovers he is changing into a vampire (by looking into a mirror, no less, like I said all conventions are shot to hell in this tale).

    Rather than find a way to cure the man (or even figure out HOW EXACTLY did it happen), Kronos is spurred on to kill him by trussing Dr. Marcus up and staking the poor victim in the heart.

    Okay... then suddenly from all of this, they decide the Durward family is the source. And the rest makes as much sense as a soup sandwich.

    Though it's supposed to come off as a serious, adventurous vampire flick, Captain Kronos, Vampire Hunter is more of a hilarious, nonsensical romp into a man hunting down a monster turning young woman into dried jerky (more or less).

    I would love Bill, Kevin & MIke to definitely give this one a view and riff this classic take on the 'modern' vampire scene.

    Here's the actual film:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsWAVsRefSg

    If you thought TWILIGHT had you scratching your head over 'sparkling' vampires, this film will make you wonder WHAT kind of vampires Captain Kronos is pursuing.

    The best way to explain is to get into the film itself. Starts off with two girls in the woods chasing one another (oh, yes, like that's REAL safe..) and one goes off alone deeper into the woods. Enter the ominous-looking, cloaked figure. Next comes the bizarre director's choice of having the camera showing us the perspective of the figure.

    At first the girl recoils in fear, then suddenly smiles (as if the 'vampire'… more

    39 votes

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17. Heaven's Gate...One of the most notorious bombs in movie history, how could they not?

    Who does the best Walken impression? Who flips out after the 200th dust cloud? Who makes the first Kenny Rogers joke? It's waiting for you in this potential skewer.

    7 votes

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18. Robocop 1-2-3 & the Reboot

    Would be fun to see just how many "Dick" Jones jokes you can you can lower the tone with, or try to avoid lol. Plus to be fair Robo 3 and the reboot are just asking to be "Rip" Torn a new one.

    "I'd buy that for a Dollar" - Although if it has Robert John Burke in it, I think a quarter will be more than generous.

    Robocop (2013) - Part man, Part machine, All PG13 crap.

    Cain's brain jar - This is what happens when you leave last last pickle in the jar just that bit too long.

    (Some movies have it coming, but some films do it to themselves)

    Would be fun to see just how many "Dick" Jones jokes you can you can lower the tone with, or try to avoid lol. Plus to be fair Robo 3 and the reboot are just asking to be "Rip" Torn a new one.

    "I'd buy that for a Dollar" - Although if it has Robert John Burke in it, I think a quarter will be more than generous.

    Robocop (2013) - Part man, Part machine, All PG13 crap.

    Cain's brain jar - This is what happens when you leave last last pickle in the jar just that bit too long.

    … more

    11 votes

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19. All episodes of Man V Monster

    You have to keep making Total Riff-Offs of Man v Monster. You just have to. I need to know what other creatures might be out there waiting for me to lick my own eyes and possibly decapitate me. I'm holding my subscription to National Geographic hostage until I get a 4th installment... Please... and Thank you.

    8 votes

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20. Iron Eagle... ALL OF THEM!!

    Over the years I used to $5 paypal you and request certain movies.
    So far, minus meat weed madness, as that wasn't to be expected as that movie is way too dumb for anyone to watch. You have made Night of the Lepus and upcoming Miami Connection.

    My next $5 donate installment is to do Iron Eagle.. ALL OF THEM!!!

    What better way to start off with some 80s good old USA propaganda of some high school student some how hacking his way (with the help of his friends) getting a F-16 fighter jet, to bomb some middle eastern country (before terrorism mind you), in hopes to rescue his dad.
    
    Then moving onto some more propaganda 80s film of usa and Russia working together to take out another middle eastern threat. Also has a late Maury Chaykin.

    Then lets bring it to another propaganda film of the 3rd one that had them flying WWII aircraft to take out drug cartel in Central America. With of course a Japanese person Kamikazeing into something while flying a Zero.

    Then the 4th one that brought trouble kids into a flying school (because thats a great idea..) that some how the star of the first movie some how came back from the dead to star in it. And also some kid who was in nickelodeon are you afraid of the dark.

    If I could attach a note to a donation, I would say all of us who are interested to do so with "Iron Eagle... ALL OF THEM!!" attached.

    Hurry up before I lose my life!

    Don't make Louis Gossett Jr. sad...

    Over the years I used to $5 paypal you and request certain movies.
    So far, minus meat weed madness, as that wasn't to be expected as that movie is way too dumb for anyone to watch. You have made Night of the Lepus and upcoming Miami Connection.

    My next $5 donate installment is to do Iron Eagle.. ALL OF THEM!!!

    What better way to start off with some 80s good old USA propaganda of some high school student some how hacking his way (with the help of his friends) getting a F-16 fighter jet, to bomb some middle eastern country… more

    14 votes

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    0 comments  ·  Delete…  ·  Admin →