7496 results found

1. 400 Days (2015 - SyFy)

   There are three things you must learn NEVER to do when it comes to watching new films: (1) NEVER follow the crowd; (2) NEVER take the suggestions from friends who dare call it 'new and different'; and (3) NEVER take viewing recommendations from Amazon or Facebook on new and unusual features.

   Regrettably this Fangarian failed to heed the third one and was pulled in hook, line, and 1000-ton-weight sinker on this oddity engineered by the same network who dared bring you ALL the Sharknado films (with one and two riffed live by the crew--shameless plug).

   Yes, SyFy decided to cash in on the isolation genre, but somewhere along the way, either the producers received a stroke, or ran out of the budget and change it into a bizarre apocalyptic film with an abrupt ending that would make the short 'Feelings: I'm Feeling Alone,' appear quite normal.

   But I digress.. you came to read about this film, and folks, I'm gonna give it to you straight...

   As with most SyFy flicks, '400 Days' does boast a great cast, but as with 'Manos,' has really no idea where they're going with it. As Amazon describes it as the Moon Meets the Divide... but from this Paranormal Time Lord's perspective.. it's more like two great Twilight Zone plots that had a horrible, inexplicable train wreck...

   Basically, '400 Days' means what it says: at some point within the Earth's Future.. four astronauts are selected for a top secret project. What is it you might ask? Why simple enough: they have to remain within a simulator for 400 Days as a means to see if they can survive an intergalactic trip to some destination, just in case... well, you know.. the Earth should somehow blow up.. the Daleks come and invade... or Mike, Kevin and Bill snap and transmit the director's cut of 'Manos: Hands of Fate' instead of the Super Bowl.

   Y'know.. end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine, stuff.

   So naturally, we get to see the simulation ship at hand, complete with an inset TARDIS-like console with touch controls. Space Suits that look like motorcycle uniforms, complete with helmets. And our lucky crew who have to endure the fun for 400 Days.

   Naturally, the film goes from there where we see the crew go through their paces day-by-day... sort of like the Shining...

   [Crew Director] Well, there goes our crew, sealed off until 400 Days later.. hope they survive better than the last ones.

   [Assistant] Uh, sir, did it ever occur to you that it was doing this that made them go insane and kill one another.

   [CD] Tell you what, after 400 Days, if we come back and find them all dead, I'll buy you a Coke Zero.

   (Of course, not actual script dialogue, but better than what we hear for the most part.)

   Anyway, as the movie does show promise into letting us see all the crew members slip slowly into bizarre madness... the director suddenly decides this is become mundane and throws us a curve ball by having an unexpected tremor hit the simulation near the end of the time allotment.

   While most are freaking out, Dane Cook keeps swearing it's all part of the simulation. Until the crew notices all forms of communication are now suddenly down and that everything seems quiet. Too quiet.. oh, unless you count the strange, naked creature that invades the simulation, prompting everyone to exit the craft.

   Eventually they do in their spacesuits to find a dark, dusty Earth.. no apes, no cannibals, no zombies, not even Charleton Heston to scream at them, 'SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!' So Brandon Routh can shrug his shoulders and say, 'So what's to know?'

   After wasting about several minutes of the film of them walking about in this dustbowl, the group finds themselves first at an abandon house, then an old-time town (good god, they still have those?) where they meet some friendly people (friendly, by the Addams sense) and that's when all sanity has flown out the window...

   So why should the RiffTrax Crew endure '400 Days?'

   (1) All Star Cast: Brandon Routh, Ben Feldman and Dane Cook (yes, that Dane Cook), and that Cavanaugh guy from Ed and the Flash as the insane one.. with this roster, how could anything go wrong? Look what the celebrity cast did for Sharknado... except where Sharknado is more of a comedy... 400 Days allegedly passes itself off as a serious, insightful film.. you know, like the Bermuda Triangle did...

   (2) Attempting figuring out what the director intended, not to mention a few inexplicable plot holes along the way. Case in point, when two of the astronauts decide to go out to make repairs on the 'hull' breach, they go out in their 'spacesuits.' Never taking them off for any reason. But when they all later go out exploring their surroundings, Dane Cook simply takes off his helmet, breathing easily, making you wonder why didn't the others simply do the same thing? Especially if they're technically still on Earth.

   And as Dane Cook keeps insisting they are still within the simulation, you sort of wonder if he's right, since the director keeps using night vision lenses periodically as if the group is being monitored by our friend, Terry from Man V. Monster, possibly searching for another mythical beast.

   After awhile you'll think 'Fun in Balloonland' had a more comprehensible plot than this... which leads into the third point.

   (3) For once, nobody has a clue to what caused this Earth's apocalyptic disaster. Truthfully, the directors never give any indication to what genuinely occurred to plunge the planet into a permanent, gusty, sandstorm realm. Atomic fallout, the Moon crashing into the planet, alien invasion, Daleks, Apes flinging their poo, the Sun going out.. nobody seems to know or care. Though there is a lot of allusions to cannibalism and the fact two of the astronauts suddenly vanish with no rhyme or reason to what fate had become of them. As well as an inexplicable love scene, because what goes better than being pursued by blood-thirsty survivors than to astronauts talking about their relationship, while being hold up in their house.

   Now for the bonus ending: Rather than spoil it for you, the ending is the most anticlimactic thing that SyFy could ever come up with, which reminded me of a series called 'In/Out' where they had a bunch of kids run a high school for two weeks like a country, but even that ending didn't make you want to whisper like Bill, 'seriously, what the hell was that?'

   Overall, this one is so bad, I'd elect this for a future RiffTrax Live Project, definitely for another Crappening, if possible or a VOD.

   Here's the Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fh5W-XRr0_0

   There are three things you must learn NEVER to do when it comes to watching new films: (1) NEVER follow the crowd; (2) NEVER take the suggestions from friends who dare call it 'new and different'; and (3) NEVER take viewing recommendations from Amazon or Facebook on new and unusual features.

   Regrettably this Fangarian failed to heed the third one and was pulled in hook, line, and 1000-ton-weight sinker on this oddity engineered by the same network who dared bring you ALL the Sharknado films (with one and two riffed live by the crew--shameless plug).

   Yes, SyFy decided to cash… more

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   28 votes

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2. Roar

   As the production of Roar involved lions, tigers, and other dangerous animals, it is unsurprising to learn that people were injured during the production. But 70 sounds like an exaggeration. In fact, one of the film’s stars, John Marshall, confirms the math is inaccurate. “Actually I think it was 72,” he says.

   Most dramatically, the film’s director of photography Jan de Bont—later the director of Speed and Twister—needed 120 stitches after being essentially scalped by a lioness. “I got him on the way to the hospital, and I went into the office and said, ‘Okay, we need to get a DP,’” says John. “Because I figured that DP was not coming back. And he came back and finished the movie! I was amazed. Jan was a trooper.”

   Principal photography on Roar started on October 1, 1976 at Santa Clarita, where most of the movie was filmed. By this point, the animal cast numbered 132 lions, tigers, leopards, cougars, and jaguars, as well as a 10,000-pound bull elephant named Timbo, which Marshall and Hedren acquired from an animal park in Canada. The shoot was scheduled to last six months but stretched to three years, thanks partly to periodic shutdowns as Noel Marshall hustled to finance a budget which ultimately ballooned to $17 million.

   http://www.ew.com/article/2015/04/15/roar-movie-tippi-hedren

   As the production of Roar involved lions, tigers, and other dangerous animals, it is unsurprising to learn that people were injured during the production. But 70 sounds like an exaggeration. In fact, one of the film’s stars, John Marshall, confirms the math is inaccurate. “Actually I think it was 72,” he says.

   Most dramatically, the film’s director of photography Jan de Bont—later the director of Speed and Twister—needed 120 stitches after being essentially scalped by a lioness. “I got him on the way to the hospital, and I went into the office and said, ‘Okay, we need to get a… more

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   50 votes

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3. The Manster

   Really? I'm the first to enter this one?
   One of my fav's... 1959 b-movie about an American reporter in Japan who is sent to do a story on an eccentric scientist. Scientist then of course proceeds to get reporter hooked on saké and women... Injects him with serum which causes another head to start growing out of his shoulder... All leading to an explosive thrilling ending...You know the usual. Fantastic acting and dialogue for riffs galore..

   119 votes

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4. Defense Play (1987)

   http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0298093/

   AKA: I.F.O. (Identified Flying Object)

   A cheesy movie about kids trying to rescue a killer military drone that develops a conscience.

   18 votes

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5. Battle Beneath the Earth and The Ultimate Warrior

   I recently found this DVD in my collection. Both of these movies really deserve a good riffing.

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   6 votes

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6. Running Delilah starring Kim Cattrall

   Watched this movie in a box set of crappy science fiction movies. Kim Cattrall plays a secret agent who dies and is brought back as robo-Kim Cattrall. It was pretty funny and think it would be a good fit for Rifftrax.
   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AY9Y7yCykQ

   5 votes

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7. Lifted (2010)

   13 years old Henry Matthews struggles with life after his reservist father is deployed to Afghanistan. With the help of a local pastor, the boy decides to take part in a local singing contest.

   Unintentionally hilarious!

   9 votes

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8. If Footmen Tire You, What Will Horses Do?

   Imagine if Eli Roth directed a Christian anticommunist propaganda film, with a budget of 20 dollars.

   8 votes

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9. DC Cab

   Please do a rifftrax on the WORST film ever made : DC Cab; starring Bill Maher, Whitman Mayo, The Barbarian Brothers, Gary Busey, Max Gail, Adam Baldwin, and Mr. T. It is a story of a young man who comes to DC to become a Cab Driver and CHAOS ensues...

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   14 votes

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10. Wild Guitar (1962)

    Arch Hall Jr. IS Bud Eagle in WILD GUITAR!

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    502 votes

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11. Excalibur

    Forged by gods, Foretold by a wizard, Found by a king. This is your chance to join the knights of the round table in a robust 140 minute cinematic adventure that is timeless... no really, it never ends.

    This 1980s award winning masterpiece needs to be riffed because...
    1. Patrick Stewart.
    2. Because it's forked tongue strikes like... like... like LIGHTNING
    3. We all love Monty Python's version of the legend, but it's time we heard your riff of the story!
    https://youtu.be/tSukMQHQLIs
    https://youtu.be/uE9fN89Jc0Y?t=1m38s

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    44 votes

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12. Dead Man Walking (1988)

    Because we need more Wings Hauser riffs! This time, however, instead of teaming up with Bo Hopkins, it's Re-Animator's Jeffery Combs!

    A post-apocalyptic film where a chauffeur (Combs) has to rescue his boss's daughter from the "Plague Zone" with the help of a merc (Hauser).

    Also stars the guy who played Leon in Blade Runner.

    This guy has a pretty good write-up on it:
    http://www.mattmovieguy.com/2011/09/dead-man-walking-1988.html

    27 votes

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13. The manhattan Project

    Please polish up this old turd.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091472/

    18 votes

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14. Sorceress

    Playboy playmates with the powers of sorcery and the martial arts, a giant space face, and... well boobs. Awesome
    trailer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibeu0mgL6Tk
    full movie - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gi2YA-9NIy4

    507 votes

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15. Action USA

    Low budget action movie made by stuntmen, Starring Ross Hagen, Cameron Mitchell and many explosions and car chases.

    One of said chases is featured in the youtube video clip,

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koM5VIyipR0

    which describes the movie as:

    Hilarious car chase (one of many!) from the obscure 1988 action flick ACTION U.S.A., an often corny but always entertaining stunt-filled extravaganza that is perhaps the best kept secret in all of action cinema. The film deals with a pair of Lethal Weapon-ish federal agents named Osborn and Panama trying to protect an attractive murder witness who also knows the location of some stolen diamonds the bad guys are willing to kill for. The high octane b-movie plays like an 80's action flick done in the vein of a 70's drive-in movie.

    In this particular scene, the villainous henchmen Drago, Hitch, & Lucky, who at this point have taken Osborn hostage, just happen to bump into Panama and the woman they're really after at a gas station run by a little man wearing what looks to be an old cavalry uniform who speaks utter gibberish. Much car crashes, random explosions, and assorted chaos ensues.

    No doubt the biggest question you'll be asking yourself after viewing this clip - aside from wondering where you can get a copy of this gem - will be just what the heck was in that bedroom?

    Low budget action movie made by stuntmen, Starring Ross Hagen, Cameron Mitchell and many explosions and car chases.

    One of said chases is featured in the youtube video clip,

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koM5VIyipR0

    which describes the movie as:

    Hilarious car chase (one of many!) from the obscure 1988 action flick ACTION U.S.A., an often corny but always entertaining stunt-filled extravaganza that is perhaps the best kept secret in all of action cinema. The film deals with a pair of Lethal Weapon-ish federal agents named Osborn and Panama trying to protect an attractive murder witness who also knows the location of some stolen diamonds… more

    32 votes

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16. Beauty and the Beast (1988)

    I hit up MST3K, but they already have the movies picked out for the season, but there is a jewel that is screaming for your words! 1988s Beauty and the Beast with Rebecca De Mornay.
    If there was ever a film, this is the pièce de résistance.

    27 votes

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17. the boy who loved trolls

    a self-explanitory made for TV film starring Susan Anton, Sam Waterston, and the guy who played Holmes in an adventure of a lifetime...or..not...and starring a young William Macy as Socrates! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwJoKVDtA0Q

    19 votes

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18. Across the universe

    A fun and beautiful, if flawed, look at some of the best Beatles songs out there, filled with castaway style time jumps and odd cameos

    24 votes

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19. Con Air (1997)

    1. Nic Cage as Forrest Gump
    2. Steve Buscemi as Hannibal Lecter
    3. John Malkovich as John Malkovich... threatening to shoot a child's stuffed bunny
    508 votes

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20. Night of the Sharks

    Two words. Treat Williams. Treat yourself to this tantalizing Floridian adventure. It is ripe with horrible acting, ridiculous mustaches, and did I say Treat Williams? Also, sharks and voodoo. Tons of great happenings, but so poorly written....and is also an Italian film? Seriously, this film must be on your radar!!!

    24 votes

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