We need a Rifftrax for this film. This became clear to me as I watched it. Somehow, it is not clear whether the movie is supposed to be a comedy, a spoof, or a satire, and in the end it fails spectacularly at all of them.

The end result is just a mind numbing weird experience that makes you wish you were doing laundry, the dishes, or anything slightly more entertaining.

As I watch the first scene with Captain Cornelius Butt (Avery Schreiber) on the bridge, I thought no one has every spoofed Captain James Kirk better than William Shatner.

I knew right then this movie need to be riffed by the professionals.

All-righty, then, let's put a bit more meat on the plate, shall we? While 1980 heralded a lot of space flicks, thanks to Lucas bringing forth 'Empire Strikes Back,' this intergalactic turkey dealt with a female android and a police crew that travels the galaxy with her.

Basically the plot is something to this effect, the police crew are sent to the furthest reaches of the galaxy to retrieve a blue crystal (which summons up singers every time it is mentioned, no seriously), and they encounter a lot of flak in the process of doing so, because a mysterious villain also wants this crystal to rule the Universe.

Why should this be riffed?

(1) Stephen Macht as Thor. Usually known for his more grittier, controversial roles, it was the first time to actually see him in a comedy. However, if you ever looked at his pic on the VHS/DVD cover, you wonder when he's being serious, if he is, or is just constipated, or in pain. Who knows? But he seems to be the only competent member of the crew. Avery Schreiber plays his commander who eat a raw egg, only to have an alien come out of his ass rather than his stomach. Mainly because he doesn't know you have to cook them (just because they're from the future doesn't mean they're any smarter).

(2) The romance between Thor and Galaxina: Favorite scene is when Thor attempts to kiss her and gets electrocuted due to her 'safeguards.' Now the funny thing here is, in the trailers, the version of 'Thor' was not originally Stephen Macht, but some other dude, and implied he was some intergalactic masher whom Galaxina tasers with her body. Imagine when the film came out, how many people were grossly disappointed to see Macht rather than the actor in the trailer. The other thing is the fact, later during their Suspended Animated flight, Galaxina upgrades herself to bypass her restrictions, and doesn't mind she an android and Thor is human. Though not really heavy to the plot itself, and the villain doesn't do much along the lines of attempting to steal the crystal (only to get foiled by the mysterious singers).

(3) The inexplicable ending to the film itself, because as they roll the credits, you hear the announcer drone on about their quest and the singers hit on cue when the blue crystal is mentioned. And you thought, Fun in Balloonland was bizarre.

Overall, this is great riffing fodder for the fact this film spoofs the genre but then just meanders into utter nonsense at the end.

This desperately needs-a-riffin'. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galaxina