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Valerian and the City of 1000 Planets (2017)

A rip off of every stupid sci-fi movie ever, it reeks of cheese. You must riff this. It's begging for it.
P.S. Congratulations on 11 Years! Me and my family wish you many more! Keep up the good work!

390 votes

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  • Matt Bagley commented  ·   ·  Report

    It's past time on this one. It would take you guys like 2 days, it's an easy one to riff. Please do it!

  • D. Ferris commented  ·   ·  Report

    My partner and I were coming up with brilliant riffs for this on the first viewing, all on our own! They practically write themselves! If we can do it, you guys can most assuredly do it better. Please do it, so we can force ourselves to finish watching. This stinker deserves it!!!

  • Robert A. Foor commented  ·   ·  Report

    Even my girlfriend (who is not a big fan of Rifftrax, but we're in counseling) thinks Valerian should get the MKB treatment.

  • B v Larson commented  ·   ·  Report

    Tried to watch valerian several times, never made it...
    Needs robots!
    Movie A calling movie C...

  • STAR WARS STINKS commented  ·   ·  Report

    Thank you, fellow RiffTrax fanns, for making this suggestion a hit! 500 votes is an honor. :)

  • Mike Tanner commented  ·   ·  Report

    Another person put it perfectly: it's a ripe example of producers thinking that if they throw tons of CGI and big actors at a film, it will succeed. I remember not even being able to get through this, not even to the Rhianna scene. It was just that bad.

  • STAR WARS STINKS commented  ·   ·  Report

    Anonymous: You took the words out of my mouth. That's the problem with movies now. They think if they have big actors and LOTS of CGI, there's no need to keep audiences hooked with a PLOT. Thank you for pointing that out.

  • Anonymous commented  ·   ·  Report

    Plot? What plot? Who needs a stinkin' plot when you have EXPENSIVE SPECIAL EFFECTS!!!

  • JW commented  ·   ·  Report

    Dane Dehaan in this film makes Hayden Christensen look as charismatic as Harrison Ford by comparison. Awful awful romantic leads. Awful. Awful. Even the leads in Jupiter Ascending had better chemistry.

  • Andy in NJ commented  ·   ·  Report

    I watched this the other night. It's a beautiful looking mess and iis in need of a good riffing. When Cara Delevigne and Rhianna are the bright spots you know the movie's trouble

  • STAR WARS STINKS commented  ·   ·  Report

    I'll have to rent it and watch it anyways, just to see how bad it is! :)

  • Anonymous commented  ·   ·  Report

    Please riff this, it is so awful I need the help of rifftrax to actually sit through the whole thing

  • Anonymous commented  ·   ·  Report

    The two main characters are sooo unlikeable. This could be my favorite rifftrax, I know it.

  • STAR WARS STINKS commented  ·   ·  Report

    I saw a trailer, and it appeared that there was a "Trumpy" (from Pod People) look alike! But I could be mistaken. :)

  • Anonymous commented  ·   ·  Report

    Omg yes. All I could think while watching this was that it was tailor made for you. Loved the movie over all, but those main characters are BAD, and beg for your attention

  • Willow commented  ·   ·  Report

    It's not even in the it's so bad it's good category. It's just bad. Like, Battlefield Earth bad.

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